I have been here for two and a half weeks and I am still on pacific time. I'm not sure what that means. I drove around the city today. Around and around and around. Trying to find the answer to the question that everyone seems to ask. Are you ready to come back home yet?
I think I've been trying to get home for a while. But every time I think I'm there, it feels like walking into an empty house instead. I'm not home material yet. This track that I'm on, it's more like being in a taxi than a broken in suv with child seats in the back and lipstick in the console.
Sometimes I go to the store and pick out paint swatches. And buy magazines with decorating tips. Sometimes I flip through baby name books.
If I came back home, it would be easy to slip into all of that. It would be natural and normal and nice.
But I'm not sure my taxi ride is up.
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