What is today?

Today is her wedding day and she would be getting ready right now all tulle and swooshing dress and boots while mother hands adjust and sister eyes memorize and she would of course count this as the best day.  Today is the day after she told me the moving news so close to my old home and my heart seared in jealousy when I smiled and told her of the trees and the lake and the storms.  Today is the day before he leaves me for another home in another state and I will no longer be his Tasha friend and he will battle his young five years of neglect with someone new and hopefully they will heal some.

Today is aching and haunting and familiar.  Today is breakfast with husband and lazing under heavy covers and fighting over the morning bathroom.  Today is kissing him goodbye after drawing up book shelf plans and choosing materials and talking about future spaces.  Today is her birthday celebration and we will drive to the city and taste wines and cheeses and have our bodies kneaded and soothed and eased back into place while we talk out the years that have twisted us into this shape.

Today is the day that I am sitting by the fire in the blue chair and my heart is holding days of tears and days of laughter and I am finding that it is possible to split into two, three, even six different places all at once if I am not careful to sit down in front of the fire and gather them all together inside of me simultaneously giving them their due.