My mom is here.  We went to dinner and I wore a blue dress that made her eyebrows pop and the waiter smile.  We ordered our favorite things and sat by the fire and I am so happy to be a daughter.  Right now she is getting ready for bed because we are going to watch a movie and eat candy.  I love having someone to watch movies with.

And laugh with.  And get dressed up with.  And talk about God with.

Maybe that's what I need to stick to.  The basics.  Because frankly, finding a soul mate is intimidating.  I'm not too excited about that search.  I think I'd be more happy with a partner in crime.  Someone to face life with. 

This morning I had a thought enter my head that was a complete stranger to me.  I would like to be home cuddling with a baby.  After a good fifteen minute panic attack, I reasoned it away.  Babies?  Who needs babies?  You have fourteen kids that you get to love and then send home every day.  You get to leave and make whatever you want for dinner and choose to not clean up and fall asleep on the couch.  You have the sweetest set up around.

But the feeling I had when that thought wandered in, it was something I can't shake.  Oh dear Lord.  What in the world are you doing up there?  Maybe I don't have my life as figured out as I thought.  Maybe I still have a few surprises left for me.  Oh, I hope so. 

But for now, I'm good.  My twinkly lights are twinkling and my feet are warm and my cheeks are a little flushed with that safe happy feeling.

Tonight I love my small, safe town.  Tonight I love not being alone.