I saw an achingly beautiful film tonight.  It was at the Panida, an old theater and my favorite place in Sandpoint.  I was feeling slumpy, but it all ended up being perfect.

I spent the evening alone because it had been a long time and I had a good time.  I am fine alone, only some times I wish my good hair days weren't wasted on myself.  But that is vain of me.

I made curry chicken and rice for dinner.  It was great and I felt proud while the chicken cooked.  Maybe I'll get a little wild and buy more someday.  One of my parents made a lemon pie for me and it tasted like summer.

Then I put on my favorite yellow dress and scarf.  And went to the movies.

The theater used to be an old opera house or something of the sort.  They give you little red tickets when you pay and their popcorn is always a little stale, but still delicious.  I sit in the balcony, third red couch over.  Front row.  You have to be careful, because you aren't supposed to take food upstairs but that is why I bring my large purse. 

It's tradition.

I do a lot of things alone and sometimes I wish that there was someone with me, but that is part of being alone.  However, there is something magical about going to the movies by yourself.  The film was about Tolstoy's life and it was one of those movies that makes your heart hurt and your breath catch.  My head aches from crying, but I don't mind.

I loved it.

I was paralyzed for the first half, I wasn't sure I was even breathing.  But then the middle happened and I curled up on my couch and smiled when Vladimir's mustache was crooked and frowned at the way he did not understand his idol.  The end caught me off guard.  I hadn't realized how swept up I was and I could not stop the tears.  It was a story that stays with you and reminds you that life is just as beautiful for its goodbyes as its hellos.

After, I went to the store.  There's a new Ben and Jerry flavor that is to die for.  It is called milk and cookies and it is even better than the real thing.

So now I am under my favorite quilt.  Still in my yellow dress because I can't make myself take it off yet.  I feel like a dream.  And I have the book that I have been working at next to me.  I am on page 286 and I have 369 pages to go.

Long books put me at ease.

"In the name of God, stop a moment, cease your work, look around you."  Leo Tolstoy